Tips to finding some personal space in your home

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While the idea of finding your own personal space probably appeals to you, putting it into reality might seem difficult for you. Especially if you have a family or housemates to consider, then finding time and space for yourself is never going to be easy.

When starting out the design process of our new home with the architect, we wanted to achieve something that worked great for a family, but equally provided some areas for us to escape for private moments where required. This included the layout of our garden, the addition of a den in our upstairs living quarters, and an office – all areas we can go to for some private R&R.

Below we share a few thoughts on why creating some personal space in your home is important, and what you need to consider.

It can be good for your mental health

Especially if you’re a bit of an introvert at heart, you will feel a lot better about life and yourself if you can take time out away from others occasionally.

You can then relax your mind and recharge your proverbial batteries while retreating into the comfort of your own company. But introvert or extrovert, this is your time to de-stress. When you’re away from the noise and distraction of others, you can do whatever it takes to unwind and escape for a little while.

You can then bounce back better and stronger than before when it comes time to engage with the people in your life and the various demands they impose upon you.

You can be yourself

You’re more than a mother, wife, father, husband or a housemate. You are an individual, and with time at home for yourself, you will be able to define who you are and engage with the things you enjoy.

Whether it’s watching television, reading a book, spending time on your favourite app, taking part in a hobby, or doing whatever it is that helps you relax, some personal time can help you re-focus on things without having to compromise with the demands and wishes of others.

You will improve your relationships

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Being around others 24/7 is not helpful. While we are sure the people in your home are perfectly lovely, being in their constant company is probably quite suffocating.

There will be times when both you and they crave personal space, as without it, tiredness and stress could set in. Then those petty squabbles will begin as you all start to get on each other’s nerves.

However, if you and they can find time to be apart, you will reduce the risk of bad vibes, arguments, and sensitive emotions. As the saying goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder, so when you return to each other’s company, you will all be less prone to fall outs and negative feelings because you will enjoy each other more.

Are you relating to what we are saying? If you have ever felt stressed out because of the company you keep, and if you have ever experienced the loss of your individuality because everything you do is somehow connected to the life of others, then you will understand the need to find time to be apart and to get into your own personal space.

Of course, as we suggested earlier, the concept of finding your own time and space isn’t always practical. However, there are some simple steps you can take.

Find a space to call your own

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Ordinarily, this might be your bedroom, but if you have a partner, then this might not be practical. If this is the case, consider the rest of your home. Do you have a spare room? Is there a corner of your home that attracts less foot traffic? Do you have a summer house or a conservatory that is rarely used by others? Find that space and then prepare it for your own needs.

You might want to focus on two specific ideals.

Firstly, you might want to create an area that is conducive to your relaxation time. This will be your go-to area when the pressures of your home threaten to get on top of you; a place where you can reflect, de-stress, and return to a calmer state.

The features you include in the space is up to you, but as examples, you might want a comfy chair to relax in, scented candles and flowers to evoke a peaceful atmosphere, and wall decor, such as these landscape wall art photography prints, to boost the serenity in your calming area.

Secondly, you might want to create an area that is fitted around your hobbies. What you add is dependant on your passions, but you might naturally include a bookcase if you enjoy reading, for example, or a workstation if you enjoy any type of craft activity.

You might also include shelving for any collectable objects that relate to your hobbies, as well as any wall art or posters that reflect the things you enjoy, such as something related to the cinema if you are a bit of a film buff.

Ideally, the space you create will allow for both ideals, but if not, focus on whatever you need as a priority for the me-time you have at home.

Find time for yourself

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Finding time for yourself might not always be easy, but find it you must, if you want to take advantage of the benefits we listed. The bathroom is always a good place to start as you tend to be in here by yourself, so a daily bath can be a great way to escape from it all and unwind for a short period of time.

Consider the average structure of your day, and then find your time for personal space within it. It might be early in the morning before other people get out of bed, or it might be later in the evening when the people in your home are in bed or engaged elsewhere.

If you have a family to consider, you might want to bring in some hired help to give you the time to have your space. For example, you might consider a childminder or a cleaner to care for your children and your home respectively, as you will then have more time to focus on yourself.

Alternatively, ask your partner to fulfill their share of the childminding and domestic duties to give you time to rest and engage your mind elsewhere.

You might also insist on a few rules with the people in your home. For example, you might set aside a time of day when people do their own things. So, your children might go to their rooms at a particular time, and your partner might do whatever pleases him.

The same might apply if you can negotiate such rules when living with housemates. You will then have the opportunity to retreat to your personal space for your me-time.

A final thought

Finding the time and area for personal space is easier for some people than others. But think about your home and what you could do. At the very least, you could find space by retreating to your bathroom to relax with a hot soak, or into your garden in the nicer weather. You will feel the benefits if you do.

Let us know what you think, and if you have managed to find time and space for yourself at home, do the right thing, and share your wisdom with us.

Until next time, take care, and thanks for reading!

Helen, Nial and Lewis


Welcome to Pikalily, an award-winning food, travel and lifestyle blog. We are Nial and Helen, a happily married couple from Northern Ireland, who share a passion for food and travel among many things. We became parents to our beautiful boy Lewis in 2017. Follow our adventures through the blog.

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